Thursday, September 24, 2009

Back in the Saddle Again...

Ugh, again. What a month, again.

So, on Septembe 2, Ariel started nursing school again. And, I got laid off from the composites job.

There wasn't much of a story to the whole thing. The custom composite shop, where I was working, is an offshoot of a boat building shop. The boat building industry is in the crapper, so my guess is that the owners are looking for a new way to make a living, and they're using the boat shop to fund the new shop until it gets off the ground. But on the day they laid me off, they were working on the last boat that they had on order, so money's drying up. Full timers were already taking time off, and there was a general round of layoffs. I was told that I'm a smart guy, very skilled, they like having me around, and when things pick up, they'd love to have me back. But for now, I don't have a job there anymore. I'm in the process of looking for something new in another field of manufacturing, but we'll see what shakes out. If I can get a decent job somewhere, I'll pretty much take it.

After 9/2/9, I spent a week or so moving the rest of our stuff into the new apartment, and getting it settled. Or more so, anyway, we're still getting things settled. And after that, I started job hunting. I'm still looking for work, but I figured it was high time I went back and faced the shop.

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My first night back in the shop was about a week and a half ago, give or take. I didn't have any outstanding projects on deck. I'm still waiting to hear back about the reclaimed lumber job, but things are hectic all over, so I still have faith that I'll hear from him. And, basically, I felt bummed out, just being in there. And I couldn't put my finger on why, for a day or two.

Basically, I felt like I'd abandoned woodworking for composites. Even though the woodworking thing is such an ingrained part of who I am, I cut it off, for a month and a half, while I was working the new job, and packing the old apartment. I'd been more committed to the composite shop than I'd intended to be, I think. So going back to the shop felt like returning to a woman I'd been cheating on, in a way, after the new affair had come undone. I was embarrassed, ashamed, madder about being laid off than I'd realized, and I really didn't feel comfortable in the shop space. I looked around, and felt almost like the whole thing had been a waste of time, despite knowing that it wasn't.

At the end of the day, it's hard sometimes, to do the things you love. And sometimes it means doing something else for a while. It's hard to remember that, sometimes.

Anyway, I've been in the shop for a few days now, part-time. I'm still job-hunting, but now that the move is over, and Ariel is back in school, I have time in the evenings again, and I'll have time, I hope, on the weekends, to go in and get things done.

The first step, at this point, is to get my woodworking to be self-sustaining, even if it's not really paying enough to sustain the rest of my life. Basically, it's a part-time small business, for the sole purpose of keeping it going. And we'll see where it goes from there.

Sorry for not posting for so long. It's not that things haven't been happening, but I consider this to be my woodworking blog, primarily. And now that I'm actually working on something again, I'll have more to write about in here.

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